I have noticed an increase in negativity these days.  Maybe it’s that I have stopped letting every little thing bother me, so it has amplified the voices of the negative nancies.  I’m not going to get all yoga instructor or anything here.   I have my cynical days and consider my smart ass comments to be quite charming.  But, do you really have to complain all day long?  Do you hate everything?  Is there anything in this world that you like?  Even just a little bit?

To this I say, have a dildo and a smile and shut the fuck up.  It’s a bit cliched and I stole that line from somewhere (I can’t even remember where), but it’s really quite fitting.  You either need to get laid or purchase something that will help you relieve a little stress, or whatever it is that causes you to be so pissed all of the time.  I know an orgasm always helps me to be just a little less bitch-tastic.

If you are someone who complains everyday, do everyone a favor and rub one out.  You’ll feel a lot better.  Trust me.  Really at this point anything would do, but we might as well get it done right.  I’m going to recommend The Outlaw by Vixen Creations.  It is made from body friendly silicone, has 9 inches of insertable length and enough balls to handle any cunt.  Take that as you will.

“The largest dildo from Vixen Creations, the Outlaw offers incredible length and girth in their signature super-realistic vixskin textured silicone.

Type: Textured life like dildo
Length: 9 1/2 inches
Insertable Length: 9 inches Circumference: 6 1/2 inches
Special Features: Boilable, Large Size, Vixskin Textured.”